A wonderful offline friend of mine who is also dealing with maternal narcissism, said this in an e-mail the other day:

N’s are like a disease. You work hard to rid your body (life) of it, but if you come into contact with other strains, your symptoms flair up. I need an anti-N-otic. 

I would so buy this antibiotic.

Hugs, TR


10 thoughts on “Anti-N-otic

  1. Boy is this a perfect quote. Your friend NAILED it. N-infection lies dormant, even after you think you’ve gotten clear of primary infective agent. It’s a nerve disease. Lies at the base of your nervous system. Flares when in proximity to other narcs. AntiNotic. Brilliant.Whoever makes that should strike it way rich.


  2. I say we invent a few on the spot antibiotics. One that might work: when talking to (ie, being the passive object listening to) a narc, get a glazed space-out look on your face, then say something that’s a complete non-sequiter and has nothing to do with them. Like, “oh look, there’s a bluejay on that branch.” Be bland as you say it. Practice looking stupid (easier for some of us than for others) and change the subject without any effort to make sense. That throws narcs for a loop. I’ve tried it a few times with my NF. I think of it as the strategic deployment of imbecility as a decoy.


  3. Lovely! Also love CS’s non-sequiter approach. They never know what to do when you don’t react to their attempts at control, manipulation, guilt, etc. Good stuff, kiddo.




    • I’ve tried the non-sequiter move a few times with my father, when he brings up the topic of my mother. I just throw out a few non-sequiters, it trips him up, then I change the subject. They are so thrown when you do this. What they don’t realize is that they often ramble in non-sequiters, as if you were living inside their head and it’s too much work to try to talk coherently to you. My NM often reminded me of a distracted cat–ooh, something moved over there! wait, there’s something behind me; just any thought dangling anywhere would lead to random observations, statements, that had no point and led nowhere. One time, for the first half hour after setting foot in my home for a rare visit, she rambled on about an acquaintance’s bunion surgery, and then something about Winston Churchill, didn’t he have problems with his feet? I think it’s so interesting when people……” Jesus. WtF?



Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s