Happy New Year! I wish you all the best for the coming the year!
As the end of 2011 approached I thought about all the things that happened this past year. I started 2011 without a job and began writing this blog. I got to meet great people, read good reads, and found support. I read the book, Will I Ever Be Good Enough, only to find that recovery, although simplified in a book, is a difficult personal journey that can not be sequentially numbered. I discovered amazing writers in so many blogs where I cried so hard that I almost drowned my laptop and laughed so loud that my stomach hurt – all of which gave me strength in recovery. I said Goodbye to 2 N female friends only to gain 2 more. I became un-unemployed only to find that some of my friends preferred being my friend when I was unemployed. My uncle and a schoolmate throughout junior high and high school passed away. Life is too short. I reconnected with some members of my Family of Origin (my aunts, NM’s sisters) and look forward to a healthy relationship in 2012 with them. I realized that I can spot an N almost immediately – I can be cautious and not pre-judge. I dealt with a lot of my behaviors, understanding my N reactions to things and realizing I have a lot more work ahead. Maybe the biggest thing for me was realizing that some people didn’t like me…and I was okay with that.
As I move forward into 2012 I take with me all this and the most important thing. Life is just too damn short. It is too short to spend one second with an N and put energy into a relationship with an N. It is too short for the BS that they put people through, it is too short to live a lie for their sake, it is just too short.
RIP Uncle and VC.